Memo to my assigns and heirs

[arliss]

Hey guys. You already got the "push me down the stairs" speech, right? Well if it doesn't completely work and I wind up in bed on life support despite my DNR? Please kick the plug out of the wall.

If something catastrophic happens before I'm ready for you to push me down the stairs? There's a DNR in place, but the hospital may override it to cover their asses. If I'm braindead and gone, do your damnedest to pull the plug as quickly as possible. Don't let them keep me around. Donate every part that can help somebody else: corneas, organs, skin, all of it. If the med school doesn't want my skeleton for the so-interesting and unique joint structure, try the body farm. If they won't take me, then freeze me and offer me to the zoo as roadkill for the big carnivores, the cats and the wolves.

If all these fail, then cremate and scatter me in the Blue Ridge. You know the overlook. The memorial service is up to you. Can't Always Get What You Want, and the Local Hero theme would be nice. Just please, no Amazing Grace by bagpipe. Scotland the Brave I'll grant you. No Amazing Grace.

Don't make me come back here.

Comments

Amen, sister ...

[castlebreaker.livejournal.com]

I'm with you. I've made it clear to Gary. We're going to do our wills, etc. when our tax returns come in this year. I had a similar experience with Mom - she'd made her living will the night before she died. It went on her chart. A copy went at the end of her bed w/her chart. What did they do at 4 AM the next morning when they called me to tell me her breathing had changed? They wanted to put her on a ventilator. I said yes at first - hell, I'd only had about 3 hours sleep and nowhere NEAR enough 7-11 hot, fresh coffee and it was 4:30 in the fucking morning ... then I did the cartoon head-shake "aayy-dee-aayy" (you know the sound) and said, "Wait - what the FUCK am I doing? No! Get out of here! Leave her be. Leave me be. Leave US be. She's dying. LET her."

Believe it? About an hour later, they brought her a breakfast tray ........

So, yes. Don't keep me going. If I'm terminal, I've told Gary *now I'm telling you* bring me home, to die amongst my things, my books, my cats, my spouse's love ... manage my pain but don't make me completely loopy. I want to be conscious as long as I can be. I want to die at home. Call hospice. Get me a nice Jewish nurse.

Then ... well I still haven't decided about the body thing but I'm definitely an organ donor at the VERY least.

Love you, woman, for your sensibility. You've had that influence on me - you and my mother. As well as the natural tendencies I must've inherited from her somewhere along the line.

L.